Volume #6-The Future of Mixed-Breeds
Da na na na na…Whippet, whippet Lex Good…
Oh man, we’re gonna have some fun this time people. It’s been awhile since my last post, but I do have an excuse. I was put on PUPRO (short for Puppy Probation) for about 3 weeks, after I worked one up and drooled all over my dad’s laptop. (You may have seen the video last week) Normal dogs get put on PUPRO for such things as digging, barking, biting…. me.. drooling and passing gas.
Anyways, I’ve been thinking lately about the trendiness and popularity of certain breeds. You know what I’m talking about, the Puggle, Goldendoodle, and the Malti-Poo have become more popular than tight-rolled jeans in the 80s. Apparently the poodle has become the flour of all doggy ingredients, but I’m making a few bold predictions here today.
The future of mix breeds is in front of you and the following four dogs will be taking over dog parks any day now.
The Wiener-pinscher
You always have to have your head on a swivel with these guys. The oh so condescending mix of the Dachshund and the Doberman Pinscher are sneaky little boogers and will sneak attack you out of nowhere, sending you to your knees. Nonetheless, the Weiner-pinscher has become popular amongst old men with bad bladders, young boys, and single men.
The Bull-Shitz
While cute, this over-the-top mix between the Bulldog and the Shih Tzu will have you shaking your head in disbelief over their extreme fish stories and odd odor. Always the first dog to provide advice and self-acclaimed expertise, I personally believe they’re full of it. Despite these odd characteristics, the Bull-Shitz is growing in popularity amongst politicians, cattle farmers, and people with the nickname “That Guy.”
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The Wookie Dog
You’ve heard it here first; the Pug-Sheepdog mix is the wave of the future. Look at this thing, what great physique and style. An odd combination of profuse shedding and snorting makes them good for… well, not much, but they sure will scare the feces out of the mailman. The Wookie Dog is becoming popular amongst Star Wars fans, and that is really about it. I stay committed to my prediction.
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Weimaruahua
An easy to manage diet of sauerkraut and chimichangas make the Weimaruahua an obvious choice for emerging mixed-breed of the future. So sleek, but oh so feisty at the same time. Cousin Zoey better keep her eye out for a stunning Weim in the neighborhood as they will be expected to mate by 2011. The Weimaruahuas are becoming popular amongst misfits, yuppies, and German hippies.
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So there you have it, the emerging trends in dog mixed-breeds. You may be laughing at my predictions, but like a Bull-Shitz once told me, “you’ll see, I know what I’m talking about.”
Until next time…Hang em if you got em, but hopefully you don’t.
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Oh, Lex, the Wookie dog is the funniest! I’m looking forward to seeing all of these dogs around town in the future!
[...] toonies and putting Icy Hot in their collars. You’ll recognize some of my teammates from my Volume Six post. Alongside of me are the Bull Shitz, Wookie Dog, and Weimarauhua. We left the Weiner-Pinscher [...]